Ramblings of an Academic Petrolhead

Win a Citroen DS4

2011-09-16T03:04:00.000-07:00

We've seen a few ad campaigns for cars recently that take advantage of the interactive devices we carry around all the time: smartphones, tablets, laptops, notebooks...

Citroen is one brand that's really taking this on board, with a new interactive campaign that allows you to win a DS4. You can check out more on their Facebook page, or watch the video below for an idea of how it works:

Good luck!

This post is sponsored by Citroen

The New Opel Astra GTC

2011-09-02T08:12:00.000-07:00

Until a short while ago, I didn't know that Vauxhall in pretty much every other country in the world is called Opel. According to the Wikipedia page (where I get all my knowledge), this is because Vauxhall is a UK company with a German subsidiary. Most of the models are identical across the board, but because around 80% of the cars are produced at the German factory in Ruesselsheim, the Opel brand is better-known worldwide than Vauxhall.

Anyway, they've produced the video below to let people know about the launch; if you click through to the website, you can design your own version, change the colour and the wheels and stuff, which actually gets strangely addictive:

This post is sponsored by Opel

Button or Hamilton: Which camp are you in?

2011-07-19T05:17:00.000-07:00

I was massively disappointed when Michael Schumacher quit F1. I've been even more disappointed since he came out of retirement. The man is a legend, and legends shouldn't come back to be less good than they were in inferior cars to the ones they originally drove.

Anyway, two of the current F1 main men are Jensen Button and Lewis Hamilton - I'm definitely more of a Button fan; he seems more down to earth, less whiny. Hamilton has the tendency to bump into people and then whinge his way around the rest of the track: "It's not faaaiiiiirrrrr...." whereas Button just gets on with it and drives like... well, a racing driver.

Johnnie Walker put together the video below to give us an insight into the life and mind of a racing driver; check it out:

This post is sponsored by Johnnie Walker

The Hseih Aerius: A Beautiful Electric Concept

2011-02-26T01:37:00.000-08:00

Pei-Cheng Hseih has designed a car that might bridge the gap between people who like green cars and actual motoring enthusiasts. I can imagine Jezza reviewing it on Top Gear, maybe with that special face he makes where he stretches his mouth so far that it looks a bit like his chin is melting down his top. The Aerius would be released in 2025, according to its creator, and would aim to bring car design back into line with racing vehicles rather than little boxes.

If he pulls it off, it'll be amazing. It's a beautiful machine. But somehow I doubt we'll ever have a truly great car that runs on electricity.

Yes, OK, more pretty pictures for your delectation:

Look at that ass!

Channeling the Batmobile

You can almost hear it growling.

Source

Ferrari FF

2011-01-23T05:56:00.001-08:00

This is way too exciting. Not content with making some of the best supercars in the world ever, Ferrari are branching out into GT sports cars. Or at least, they've released a new concept car, the FF, which will make its debut at the Geneva Motor Show. It stands for 'Ferrari Four', because it has four seats and four-wheel drive. It's sporty, it's exciting, it's bright red (of course) and... well, it's a Ferrari.

Mid-life crises just became a whole lot cheaper.

Picture credit

Tesco Compare Car Insurance

2011-01-17T06:08:00.000-08:00

I’ve recently discovered the Tesco Compare Car Insurance website, which despite not being directly relevant to my life at the moment (my 26-year-old Volvo died a death a while ago), is certainly something I’ll be bookmarking for future use. You’d think it might be unfairly skewed towards a certain provider, but actually it’s very impartial, and a lot simpler to use than some of the competition.

All you need to do is stick your details into the form and it will generate the results. There are a number of handy features, including a jargon buster which lets you know exactly what constitutes an ‘Act of God’. Apparently lightning and earthquakes are signs of divine intervention. Who’d have known?

There’s also a list of car insurance providers, with a little blurb about each one, so you can choose the one which sounds like it’s closest to what you need. All in all, a pretty handy website – I might well head over there the next time I pick up an ancient Volvo...

Top Gear Special Christmas Editions

2010-12-29T09:52:00.000-08:00

...just weren't the same. There's no Stig. I know Ben Collins was mean and cruel to blow his cover, but everyone who made the slightest bit of effort to find out already knew it was him anyway. There was admittedly the birth of the Baby Stig, which was pretty fun, but the whole programme just seems to be getting less and less realistic. It was more fun when they dropped caravans on things and raced supercars around the track. Now it seems as if they believe that the only thing people want to watch is them all nearly dying on a weekly basis, which actually isn't all that fun. I like the Top Gear guys. I don't want them to die. Not even Jezza.

Hopefully Baby Stig will lighten things up again. I think it would be awesome if they actually made a child drive their reasonably priced car around the track every week. Probably illegal, but still awesome.

Picture credit

Coyote Speed Camera Alerts

2010-11-23T12:31:00.000-08:00

When you're driving through your hometown, you know where the speed cameras are, so you can slow down to avoid them. Everybody knows this, it's one of the reasons I particularly like Clarkson's idea of just getting rid of all of them. However, sometimes you'll stray further afield. Perhaps to a party. Perhaps to the beach. Perhaps just for a nice day out in the countryside. And, inevitably, you'll come across a beautiful road that's perfect for going that extra mile per hour or ten. The problem with that is, you have no idea when the speed cameras will be coming up.

Coyote are solving this problem. The little gadget that fits easily onto your dashboard shows you more than 26,000 speed cameras across the country - both fixed and mobile ones - warns you when you enter speed-restricted zones, calculates your average speed for you... essentially, it does everything you could ever want it to do.

Plus they've made a pretty fun promotional video for it:

EVs on their eco-friendly way

2010-11-23T00:11:00.000-08:00

It seems the eco-friendly automobile is a thing of the near-future rather than light-years away. The arrival of mass market electronic vehicles (EVs) is much anticipated amongst those who choose to live “green”, but it is generally thought to be a long time coming. Currently, the premiums on plug-in-hybrids and EVs are just too great to be a viable option for automobile manufacturers. And while many production companies are eager for the EVs to take off, as the “clean” machines will open up many avenues of new business, they are just too expensive.

However, one company, the General Electric Company (GE), is taking the first steps towards lower carbon count and cleaner, greener pastures. It recently announced its decision to buy 12 000 plug-in or electronic vehicles from General Motors (GM). It will start off with the soon-to-be-released Chevy Revolt and, in a revolutionary move, has pledged that by 2015 half of its fleet of 30 000 vehicles will be electric.

As one of the renewable energy industry’s biggest players, GE claims that it will exceed more than $500million in near-term revenues just from playing a part in the EV infrastructure market.

The EVs themselves are appealing vehicles; they look good, and, if the premiums can be lowered enough for the cars to become affordable for the everyday person, they’ll save users money while being easy on the environment – a big plus in these carbon cloudy days.

Thierry Koskas, the head of Renault’s electric vehicle project, stated recently that by the year 2016 approximately 5% of the world car market would be comprised of EVs. He was addressing the Reuters Global Autos Summit in Paris where most other executives at the summit were less optimistic about the prospects for EVs’ in the near future.

No matter when they will be released, hybrid and electric cars are finally becoming a reality. As they say, “Rome wasn’t built in a day”.

---

Jade Scully is a copywriter, blogger and online marketing enthusiast who has published her work on a series of online publications and websites including Leeulekker who provide a range of automotive resources for southern Africans.

Volkswagen's Ultimate Family Heroes

2010-10-22T06:23:00.000-07:00

Quite a fun new campaign from Volkswagen to promote their Touran and Sharan cars - they've put together a competition to find the Ultimate Family Hero. Four people have been nominated for services ranging from helping with homework to baking tasty cakes. Sophie is currently leading the competition with 47% of the vote, but you can choose your favourite here.

Halo Interceptor

2010-10-17T05:15:00.000-07:00

Yes, it's a fantastic name. It's also an amazing vehicle. It comes with special attachments that allows you to use it as a boat, a helicopter or an aeroplane. Based on the Bugatti Veyron, it's probably only viable if you're stinking rich, but anyone can dream, right?

The Fastest Pizza Delivery In The West

2010-10-05T15:08:00.000-07:00

If you thought being a pizza delivery guy was boring, think again! Breaking out from the usual small car/bike/moped theme, Domino’s pizza in Wales has just introduced their very own Ferrari 360 Spyder to celebrate the launch of their Pontyclun branch.

Monday the 4th of October was an exciting day in the South Welsh town. International rugby union player Ryan Jones, who plays for the Ospreys, headed along to Pontyclun for the official launch party, where they unveiled the lean, mean delivery machine.

So what does the car look like? Here’s a sneak preview, but if you want to see it in the flesh (metal?), you’ll have to get to Pontyclun:

It’s been vinyl-wrapped in Domino’s promotional branding – usual practice for many business owners, though most don’t have quite the same high standards when it comes to style!

Who’ll be driving it? Probably the luckiest pizza delivery guy in the UK. I’m sure applications for jobs at Domino’s will increase the more Ferraris they bring into their fleet of delivery vehicles...

With a top speed of 186mph, and the ability to go from 0-60 in just 4.3 seconds, there’s no doubt that Domino’s will be the fastest pizza deliverers in Wales, though they assure us that they’ll be adhering to the speed limits.

Unfortunately I managed to miss the opening event, living so far away from Wales, but if you went along, I’d love to hear from you!

The Ultimate Summer Supercar

2010-09-23T06:38:00.000-07:00

(Click to enlarge)

Yeah, all right, it's a bit late. I know summer's finished and the autumn equinox has just passed. But I've just rediscovered the results of Top Gear's ultimate summer supercar poll stashed on my computer, so I thought I'd share them. What did I vote for? The Gallardo, obviously. Look at it! It's beautiful!

What would your ultimate summer supercar be?

Lamborghini picture credit

3D Children: Speed Bumps of the Future?

2010-09-14T03:46:00.000-07:00

In a slightly bizarre new initiative, a traffic safety foundation in Vancouver is using 3D art to make drivers aware of the hazards of children running onto the road. The girl chasing a ball appears to rise out of the road as the car approaches:

Now, in principle, this would make you slow down. In practice, it might well just give you a mild heart attack and make you slam on the brakes, causing a huge pile-up over a piece of artwork. I like the idea in theory, I just don't think it works so well in practice... also, as many other people have pointed out, if drivers get used to seeing these 3D children they can drive over, what's to stop them mistaking a real one for a 3D one in a moment of stress?

What do you think? Good plan? Bad plan?

Juggling the costs of car ownership

2010-09-13T12:08:00.000-07:00

You’ve shopped around. You’ve wandered past showrooms of beautiful supercars, gazed through the windows and stared with puppy-dog eyes at the salespeople, having no effect whatsoever; because let’s face it, big sad eyes don’t equate to big wads of cash. You’ve compared car insurance quotes, you’ve worked out how much space you need, maybe you’ve even worked out your average yearly mileage and come up with a clever money-saving formula.

Now all you have to do is buy the car and keep it running. You might think the decision of what to buy is the difficult bit. Oh no. Ohhhh no. The difficult bit, like anything, is keeping it going. Sometimes I get a sudden, desperate urge to clean my house (admittedly not very often). I scrub and wrestle with furniture and move things and drop things on my toes and rearrange and tidy until it sparkles. Two days later, I realise I haven’t done the washing up and everything is in a heap in the middle of the bedroom floor. For me at least, the starting isn’t the hard part. It’s the carrying on.

So what can you do to make sure you’re being economically sensible about car ownership? There are some very simple steps you can take to make sure your car isn’t costing you a small fortune every time you fire up the engine and trundle off to see grandma. Here are my top 3:

Remember to check things
If you stop at a petrol station, try to work out when you last looked at your oil and water levels. You’ll probably have a constant eye on the petrol gauge, but lots of people forget about the oil until the light comes on, costing themselves extra money. Check it every so often and keep it topped up.

Replace things yourself
It might sound obvious, but the number of people who take the car into the garage to have someone else change the oil, windscreen wipers or water is pretty astonishing. It really isn’t that hard to do, and if you’re really terrified of anything mechanical, you’ll probably have a friend who’ll do it for the price of a beer.

Don’t use premium petrol
Seriously, what’s the point? I’ve never really understood it. Perhaps there is some sort of secret magical formula, but in my experience premium petrol is a higher price for no extra benefit.

Picture credit

New Mazda Shinari Concept

2010-09-02T00:42:00.000-07:00

This is the new Shinari concept from Mazda. It's very, very pretty. It looks like a car that will growl at you when you start it up, then purr as you drive along the road. But, as they say, looks aren't everything. And this car does seem to have the classic Mazda problem: no visibility out of the rear window. The only Mazda we've ever had, a hideous turquoise sporty thing, made reversing feel like impending death on wheels. Totally blind. Other people have told me similar stories of their Mazdas; and while this one is pretty, I'd rather be able to see when I reverse. Still, at the moment it's just a concept. Maybe they'll introduce something magical to make it easy to reverse, if and when they release the real thing.

Picture credit

Petrolheads Paradise

2010-08-12T02:26:00.001-07:00

Guest post by Dani

I absolutely love driving. In fact I would go as far as saying that I am utterly obsessed by it. I love everything there is about cars, whether it be the sound of the engine or the smell of petrol. I can also quite honestly admit that I have not voluntarily stepped foot on public transport since passing my driving test.

I would drive anything and everything if possible, but unfortunately it is not, and so my sporty little Renault Clio will have to do for now. I simply do not have the funds or the driveway space for all the vehicles that I dream of fitting on there. However, I have discovered a way to fuel my driving obsession; the next best thing to actually having the cars sitting in my garage. They are called ‘experience days’ and what I am specifically talking about is driving experience days which must be one of the most perfect ways for us petrolheads to spend some quality time with the motors we can only dream about.

From karting to stock car racing; dumper truck racing to rally car driving; motorbikes to quads; Ferrari to Aston Martin; classic car driving, supercar driving and off road driving. All your driving dreams can be met in a couple of clicks of the computer mouse and a day off work. If you’ve ever wondered what it is like to drive one of the fastest cars ever made, then these days are for you. If you’ve ever wanted to be behind the wheel of the classic British cars then these experiences are not to be missed. Every car dream you have ever had can become a reality. Well, apart from time travelling in the Delorean DMC-12 from Back to the Future – we need to stick to realistic dreams and not out and out fantasy!

If weird and wacky is your thing, have you ever fancied driving from the comfort of a sofa? Or even travelling while relaxing on a double bed? Or seeing the British countryside from a motorised office? Well all this is possible too, for a price of course. Experiences start from about forty pounds for experiences such as a quad bike taster session and can be as much as a couple of thousand pounds for the hiring of a supercar for the weekend. What I can guarantee is that there will be a driving experience with a price to suit everyone.

The most popular and reputable companies offering driving experiences are: ‘www.virginexperiencedays.co.uk’, ‘www.intotheblue.co.uk’ and ‘Red Letter Days’ although others are available if you do a quick internet search. However there are often numerous Red Letter Days discount vouchers available on the internet through a variety of discount sites, and if you type ‘Red Letter Days Discount codes into Google the chances are you will find something to lessen the cost. Red Letter Days are also available through some high street shops such as Boots. So, even if driving is not your thing, a gift like this for a petrolhead will be really appreciated and talked about for a long time.

Candle Scooter

2010-07-06T14:17:00.000-07:00

Not the most practical thing in the world to drive, but if you've got an old scooter that's broken down, why not use it as a candle holder?

Found here

This. Would. Be. AWESOME.

2010-07-06T11:48:00.000-07:00

When I was a teenager, one of my friends had an obsession with dolphins. She had dolphin posters, dolphin ornaments, dolphin jewellery... and yes, they're lovely. But personally, I've always thought it would be more exciting to swim with sharks. Until I saw this, from Mazda, whose thrillseeker guys look like they're having such a great time. OMG. Whale riding!

Mazda Thrillseekers: Buffalo Racing

2010-06-30T08:57:00.000-07:00

Carrying on with their crazy-but-brilliant thrillseeking theme, here are the guys from Mazda showing us the art of buffalo racing. I'm not sure I'd jump on the back of a large stampeding animal with big horns, but I'm sure it is quite an adrenalin rush!

What's the most thrilling animal you've ridden? Personally, I haven't even done any horse-riding, though I have ridden an elephant. Only once. And it was very docile. Certainly not stampeding.

Top Gear Outtakes

2010-06-29T04:12:00.000-07:00

In which James May tries (and fails) to be clever:

More outtakes here, in which James May cooks breakfast on a volcano.

Condor Gliding

2010-06-25T07:40:00.000-07:00

Continuing on their theme of thrilling things, Mazda have released this video showing a (very brave!) person condor gliding. I must say the view must be amazing, but I'm not sure I'd be courageous enough to try it!

Top Ten Driving Roads

2010-06-17T05:36:00.000-07:00

In celebration of Mazda's new Zoom Zoom Weekends campaign, here are some beautiful roads I've found on my travels around the Interweb; none of them are ones I've travelled myself, apart from the first one.

1. The Dalveen Pass, which is incredibly beautiful, especially in the early evening:

2. The Yungas Road in Bolivia, a.k.a. Top Gear's 'death road'...

...home to That Terrifying Moment With Clarkson:

3. Sticking with the Top Gear theme; the Stelvio Pass:

...on which the boys drive a Lambo, a Porsche and an Aston:

4. I have no idea where this one is, but it looks like so much fun!

5. As does this one:

6. Australia's Great Ocean Road, running along the coast of Australia for over 150 miles:

7. The Transfagarasan Highway in Romania:

8. This one. No idea where it is, but it's lovely:

9. This one, because it's beautiful and looks so calm:

10. The Loneliest Road in America; like most petrolheads, I fantasise about roaring down it in a Bugatti:

What are your ultimate driving roads?

Noble M600

2010-06-15T01:24:00.000-07:00

I once came across one of these, of all places, outside a newsagent's shop at 5.30 in the morning in one of those nowhere towns very few people have heard of. I wandered out of the shop with my milk or chocolate or whatever I'd been buying, and stopped dead when I saw a large blue beauty parked right in front of me. On a double-yellow line, of course. Then a guy wandered nonchalantly up to it, got in and roared away. Since then, I have wondered why the Noble doesn't get more attention. Up close, they are beautiful and they sound divine (though probably not to the residents who don't get up quite so early).

Here's Clarkson testing the M600:

Venom GT

2010-06-15T00:49:00.000-07:00

Remember a while ago I blogged about the Hennessey Venom GT? Well now Top Gear has the official images. Here are a few found on their website:

*purrs*

And here's a video taster:

I do like the sound of a sports car engine with my coffee in the morning.

Mitsubishi ASX Challenge

2010-05-11T07:02:00.000-07:00

As competitions go, this new one from Mitsubishi is pretty cool. The prize: a Mitsubishi ASX. The challenge? Play a game. And it's a fun game, too. You're in control of a car, and the object of the game is to navigate through a city, earn points and complete various mini-challenges along the way. Unfortunately, in the course of playing, I remembered why I don't drive: I found it much more fun to crash into things and hear the crunching noises and beeps of exasperation. At one point I caused a bit of a pile-up outside the police station:

Still, whether you're in it to win it or just to crash into other drivers and have a bit of fun, it's definitely worth a look. It'll keep you amused, and you might get a new car out of it. Can't get much better than that! Here's some more info and a preview:

The Common People

2010-04-29T05:42:00.001-07:00

I love election time.

David Cameron Exposed

2010-04-29T03:51:00.001-07:00

Hehehe.

Who should you vote for?

2010-04-27T06:59:00.001-07:00

Introducing the Hennessey Venom GT

2010-04-27T02:26:00.000-07:00

A Top Gear world exclusive has just unveiled the Hennessey Venom GT, apparently a car to rival the legendary Bugatti Veyron. The car is based on the Lotus Elise, but looks so much better:

With a lightweight British chassis and an American V8 engine, it's set to take the supercar world by storm. The carbon fibre bodywork keeps it light, while the 6.2 litre LS9 V8, tweaked by Hennessey to 725bhp, promises an incredible amount of strength and beauty in a handsome machine. They'll only be making ten cars per year, and four have already been ordered, so if you want one, get your order in quickly!

Here it is doing a test drive:

It's certainly pretty, but can it rival the Bugatti? We'll have to wait and see.

Votematch

2010-04-22T04:28:00.001-07:00

Actually very interesting; another one of those 'who do you really agree with' parliamentary apps.

 You are reading this because your browser doesn't support Iframes. Try this <a href="http://www.votematch.org.uk/index.php" target="_blank">link</a> instead.

Tidying Up Downstairs

2010-04-09T08:32:00.000-07:00

Wilkinson Sword have done it again, with a hilarious ad reminding women to 'tidy up downstairs' before summer. A Desperate Housewives-esque clip that will have you giggling from the very beginning, it features a ridiculously addictive song as well:

Jensen Button learns to drive

2010-03-26T08:40:00.000-07:00

Well, learns to drive a taxi, at any rate. In an unusual yet effective ad campaign from Walkers, the small town of Sandwich was transformed into the most exciting place in Britain for the day. Different celebrities were dispatched around the area to try out new trades; among them, Jensen Button, who spent the day having to follow the speed limit in a taxi. I'm quite a fan of Button's - certainly prefer him over Hamilton - but it's evident that even he agrees that it's best for him to stick to racing and leave the taxicabs to the professionals.

In other news, the second race of the season is happening on Sunday; here's hoping it's more exciting than Bahrain, which felt like a bit of a parade. I still haven't decided who I'm officially supporting, but I did find my instinct driving me to sit forward on the sofa and whisper "Come on, Schumi! Come on!", so perhaps that's a pointer...

Notes on the Salon de Genève

2010-03-13T02:55:00.000-08:00

It's March 2010, and that means that the Salon de Genève is under way. Ending tomorrow, we've already seen most of the cars that will be gracing the show, and here are my most comment-worthy picks:

Peugeot BB1 electric. What an ugly, strange-looking car. The electric car industry has already won over a lot of followers - specifically, eco-friendly car buffs - but if they want to reach out into the Top-Gear-watching majority, who buy cars not only based on economy but also on beauty, they're going to have to try a lot harder than this.

Citroen Revolte: add an '-ing' to the end of that name, and you'd be about right. It's beyond disgusting. Look at it! It's a monstrosity!

Speaking of monstrosities, this is another of Citroen's entries; doesn't it remind you of a goldfish?

Then there are, of course, the good bits: Bugatti, who can do no wrong:

Lamborghini, who have gone for their classic lines and have not failed to impress:

Ferrari... hmm, what is that? It looks like a squished, drunk, sickly Porsche. Oops.

...but then there's this: a saving grace, but still not quite in the league of beauty usually lovingly sculpted by Luca Serafini and his ilk. Remember Serafini's 2008 concept? It's the one below the strange red thing that looks a bit like a Honda with a Ferrari sticker. Now Serafini's design: that's a beautiful car.

Strange red thing:

Serafini's beautiful 2008 concept:

Mercedes took to the stage with an elegant, smouldering creation:

...and then, of course, there were the weird concept cars; the most notable of which was probably the Honda 3R:

Looking like a cross between a hoover and a motorised scooter, it doesn't take the prize for beauty, but it's always interesting to see what happens when you give a designer too much coffee and stick him next to a pad.

The Formula 1 Season is upon us!

2010-03-10T00:42:00.000-08:00

...and I am so excited! This year's Formula 1 is going to be awesome. Such an amazing combination of drivers: one, in fact, that most people never thought they'd see. So, in keeping with Ian Dury & the Blockheads, here are my F1-related Reasons to be Cheerful:

1. Michael Schumacher. Of course he's my number one reason. I was a Schumi supporter for as long as I watched Formula 1, and then, horror of horrors, he left. Now he's back, but there's a dilemma: he's driving for Mercedes GP. I'm not a Mercedes fan. I don't want to be a Mercedes supporter. I like Ferrari. And last year I liked Brawn. In fact, I think I'm possibly just a fan of Ross Brawn's... though that would mean that this year I'm supporting Mercedes & Schumi. Oh, I don't know. It's so hard to decide! Still, a Schumi victory would make me happy. The man is a legend.

2. Button & Hamilton on the same team. Ohhh this will be interesting. I'm definitely more of a Button fan than a Hamilton one. Jensen just seems a little less arrogant, a little less cocky, and a little less annoying. Still, I'm not a McLaren fan. I don't really care what happens with either of these guys, though I'm hoping Button finishes ahead of Hamilton.

3. Massa's back! I love the guy. He always seems so... nice. I just want to wrap him up in a duvet, give him a hot chocolate and tell him it's all going to be OK. Of course, he's driving for Ferrari; I supported Ferrari for a very long time, but really it was Schumacher I supported, rather than the team. Then when Massa was driving for them, I thought I'd support him, because he seems nice. Now I'm really not sure. Schumi's back but on the wrong team, Massa's on the right team but there are better drivers on the grid... what to do? Confusion ensues.

4. Virgin Racing. Well well. As far as incredibly rich men with a reasonable shot at taking over the world go, I quite like Mr. Branson. He still seems human, unlike many people with multi-national, multi-operational, multi-everything companies under their belts. Also, a friend of mine used to work in a Virgin shop, and was invited to a big party along with all the other Virgin employees in the area. Mr. Branson turned up and met each one, shook their hand and spoke to them. Personally, I like that kind of touch. It goes a long way when you show your humble shop-working employees that you like them. Thus, despite it being a definite underdog, I wouldn't be unhappy for Virgin to take some credit this season. They have Glock, and I think he deserves a shot at being great. Though to be honest, I'm kind of hoping Schumi will burst back onto the F1 stage on full form, sweep the floor with the other drivers in all 19 races, and reclaim his title as worthy champion.

*edit* Also, a little later on, when I was discussing all this with Husband, he commented that I was the only person he knows to be excited about Virgin. He implied that it's a sensible thing to be excited about, because "after all, when have you known Richard Branson to fail at anything?" A very good point. I rest my case: this season is going to be fantastic.

We'll see. But it's going to be an exciting year!

International Women's Day

2010-03-07T22:21:00.000-08:00

So, according to one of my Facebook friends, today is International Women's Day. So here are some of my favourite women:

Esma Redzepova

Why? Have you heard her voice? The woman rocks.

The Suicide Girls

Why? Quite simply, because I like looking at pretty things, and they are pretty things who like being looked at. There seems to be a lot of shying-away from admitting that actually, some women - normal, everyday women as well as celebrities and supermodels - like dressing up, strutting around and being noticed. And there's nothing wrong with that.

Dakota Fanning

Why? The kid can act. To have her level of raw talent from such a young age really is something to be admired.

Stacey Solomon

Why? Because it's so refreshing to see someone who is really just herself, all the time. Unassuming, unimpaired, and so obviously a lovely person.

Janis Joplin

Why? No explanation needed. A great singer, someone who brings a sense of self to everything she does and who looks very comfortable in her own skin.

Aretha Franklin

Why? The voice. Ohhh the voice. And again, the ability to take a song and make it entirely her own.

Christina Aguilera

Why? To be honest, I'm not sure. But I've always quite liked her, mainly (I think) because I see her as less of a sell-out than some popular female artists. She's still very much herself, whilst managing to hold down a reputation in the mainstream. I like that.

Amanda Palmer

Why? Because she loves what she does, she's incredibly dedicated, she makes interesting art and engages with people.

New limited edition pink Fiat 500

2010-02-14T22:13:00.000-08:00

Apparently, it's the best small car of recent years. Well, that seems to be what Top Gear is implying, and we trust their judgement because they love Lamborghinis too. Stylish, pretty and perfect for the girly driver, the pink Fiat 500 is a limited-edition dream.

Some features include:

• 15” Alloy Wheels

• Start&Stop

• Electric sunroof

• Black POP interior

• Leather gear knob

• Side rubbing strip with 500 logo

• Special Pink key cover

• Special car mats stitched with Pink 500 logo

• Special chrome body features

• Air conditioning

• Blue&Me

With a 1.2 litre engine and a top speed of 99, it's hardly going to blow your mind on the M40. But it's cute, it's pretty and it's £11,700.

More info here.

Top Gear, Seasick Steve and Cars of the Decade

2010-01-10T21:41:00.000-08:00

So, Top Gear has screeched to a halt again, until the next series. I tend not to realise the series is coming to a close until the end of the final episode, which always tinges it with disappointment. Still, it'll be back; though apparently there are people out there saying it has 'lost its touch'. Which cannot possibly be true. As long as the Stig is alive and Clarkson is breathing, Top Gear will rock.

Seasick Steve was fantastic as the Star in a Reasonably Priced Car; I was introduced to his music at Hard Rock Calling last year, and was instantly impressed. Such a wonderfully down-to-earth guy. If only more musicians could be like that. Or just more people, to be fair to

musicians.

Top Gear's Car of the Decade was, rightly, the Bugatti Veyron. It did redefine the concept of 'car' altogether, so it definitely deserved the title; though I must say the Pagani Zonda comes a close second in my opinion, purely because it is absolutely beautiful as well as being pretty damn quick. The Gumpert, despite its clunky name and not-so-beautiful exterior, would probably make my number three spot, followed by a token Lamborghini, then a token Ferrari... well, just because they have to be there really, don't they?

Bugatti Veyron:

Pagani Zonda:

Gumpert:

In boring-car terms, the Renaults Clio and Megane - all the new models - were pretty impressive as little cars go. And of course, the iconic 'shakin' that ass' Megane advert only added to their appeal. I have also heard only good things about the new Fiat 500; though I must say that the original of that particular car was in my opinion so quirky, individual and iconic that it probably should never have been re-made. Still, apparently it's good.

Failures... well, of course, the new Beetle, which is as ugly as it is ungainly. The so-called "new Mini", a.k.a. the "not-very-small BMW", though I suppose that wouldn't have fitted so easily on the product description sheets.

Overall, however, a pretty good decade for cars; here's hoping that the next one will be even better.

The Boss from Hell: Why I just quit a job for the first time in my life

2010-01-05T14:27:00.000-08:00

First of all, let me just make clear that I have not quit my fantastic advertising job, nor have I quit my also fantastic research job, nor have I quit my freelance work. Just to set the record straight, my bosses for the first two are wonderful, and my boss for the third is me. No, I quit my other job, which shall remain nameless.

So, without further ado, here is the email I sent when quitting the Job with the Terrible Boss. I've changed the company name and the title of my position to ensure the anonymity of the other people involved.

I am writing to terminate my employment with the company in the position of Department X Manager. Whilst I would prefer not to just write a list of grievances, I am concerned that if I do not make my reasons for leaving crystal clear then it will be intimated that I left due to time constraints or lack of dedication, which would be incorrect.

I have encountered a number of issues since I started working for the company. My main reasons for leaving are as follows:

1. When I first applied for the position, I made it clear that I have a number of other jobs. I stated before the interview, during the interview and after being offered the position that I would still be working at my other places of employment, but was told that this was not a problem as long as I could fit in the work required. I was told that I would need to work roughly 21 hours per week until January, then roughly 40 hours per week from January to March. I spoke with my immediate manager and described how I would fit this in; she agreed that it sounded plausible. However, once I began working for the company I was repeatedly told that “something has got to give” and asked to leave my other jobs, despite meeting deadlines and hitting work targets consistently. Although I politely requested on a number of occasions that my immediate manager did not ask me to quit my other jobs, she continued to do so.

2. A few weeks before I was due to start work, I was asked to supply a list of dates on which I would be available for training. This I did via email. A few days before I was due to begin, I had still heard nothing about training and so sent an email asking when this was to be arranged. I received no reply. A few days later, whilst at a funeral for a close friend’s father, I received a frantic message from my immediate manager who asked me why I was not at the office. I asked why I was supposed to be there, and she informed me that I was meant to start training that day at 10.00. I replied that I was at a funeral, as had been detailed in the email regarding my availability, and asked whether she had informed me that I was supposed to be at work. She replied that she had not. How, then, should I have known? She seemed stumped by this question.

3. The job description stated that I would need to work ‘some weekends and evenings’; this I agreed to readily, as I have no objection to working unsociable hours; indeed, I have done so on many occasions since the commencement of my employment at the company. However, about a week into my employment with the company I gave six months’ notice of a single weekend on which I would be unavailable to work should it be called for. Bearing in mind that my contract is a casual one and that I have no requirement to give notice of any dates on which I am not available, I felt that I was being courteous by giving notice well in advance. I explained that one of my closest friends was getting married, to which I was told that my friend would “have to move her wedding”.

4. I have been telephoned and/or texted on a number of occasions at unsociable hours of the night – once at 1.50 in the morning and once at 5.30 in the morning, to give a couple of examples. These messages were always about non-urgent subjects that could easily have been discussed the next day.

5. There has been an astonishing lack of organisation displayed by my immediate manager throughout the course of my employment. To give a couple of examples: when I first sent in my application form, she lost it three times, then told me I had to fill in a different form as she had sent me the wrong one. A few months later, I was asked to print 350 copies of a 250-page document and told that we could not use the printing unit for this purpose. I therefore worked Saturday and Sunday, as well as a 20-hour day on Tuesday and a 17-hour day on Wednesday to get it finished, only to be informed that I had been given the wrong instructions and that actually the document to be printed was a completely different one. I was then told that we could in fact use the printing unit for this purpose, and was asked why I had not done so before. This unsurprisingly caused me a great deal of stress, not least when I was told that if I gave up another of my jobs, I would have less of a problem with time management. The problem has never been time management; it has been organisation at the level above my own.

6. I have been repeatedly told that I am supposed to be at a meeting, at work, or somewhere else when I had not been previously informed. Upon asking my immediate manager whether she had requested my presence, she would admit that she had not, but would say that I was “supposed to be there anyway”.

7. I have been ridiculed and/or reprimanded on a number of occasions for refusing to engage in unprofessional conduct. My immediate manager has also made frequent demands that are professionally both unacceptable and ridiculous; for example, when I had informed her that I would be in a business meeting, she called my husband at home and asked him how to get in contact with me. He had to explain, very slowly and carefully, that I was in the meeting I had told her about and therefore not at the end of my phone. When I left the meeting I found her outside in a state of panic; she told me that in future I should have my phone in front of me and on loud whilst I am in meetings, which is frankly ludicrous.

8. This is the only job I have ever had in which I have been discriminated against on the basis of my age. I have been working full-time, “proper” jobs since I was 17, and it has always been my experience that a manager will receive a Curriculum Vitae, review the potential employee’s experience, education, abilities and qualities, and hire them on that basis. This was not the case with this company. It quickly became obvious that my immediate manager had not bothered to read the application form she asked me to fill out four times, and that I had been hired because I am relatively young. She has also shown a huge lack of respect for my other jobs. For her benefit, therefore, there follows a list of my other current positions:

- I am a manager at a leading viral marketing agency. This is not just a small, part-time position that can be thrown away, and I do not appreciate it being patronised.

- I am an academic research assistant at the University of Oxford; undoubtedly it will be agreed that this too is a position that is both prestigious and important to my future development. Whilst I do not wish to blow my own trumpet, I do aim to demonstrate that her constant demands for me to leave my other jobs were utterly uncalled for. It is true that it is very unusual for one so young to hold these positions, but this does not detract from the fact that I do.

I have found it far beyond offensive that I have been repeatedly requested to “just give up” my other jobs in order to cater to the every whim of someone who cannot even be bothered to check her email correctly.

When I applied, I was also told that I would be earning £6.57 per hour; the actual wage was £6.38; admittedly a small digression, but one that adds up. I recommend that in future you check job descriptions for accuracy before employing people.

I have not received any expenses payments since I joined the company, despite being assured that these would be made monthly. I have asked both my immediate manager and the head of the team why this has happened, and have received no response from either of them.

As the employment officer will be able to verify, my contract is held on a casual basis and I therefore have the right to refuse work at any time without notice. I will not be working for the company again. I expect to see my wages for December in my bank account at the end of January, along with the three months’ worth of expenses payments that should have been made. Unfortunately, if this does not happen, I shall have to seriously consider taking legal action.

I have been working since I was twelve years old in all sorts of positions ranging from Saturday jobs to early-morning cleaning jobs to running shops, departments and businesses, and have never encountered this level of unprofessionalism from anyone, let alone from a so-called ‘manager’. I have never had to quit a job in my life; previously, I have only left the employ of companies and individuals due to moving house, and have always been sad to go. I regret to tarnish this record by quitting now, but there is no other option.

I recommend that in the future, the position is given to a gap-year student who has no other demands on their time, and who has parents who can afford to both run them everywhere at very short notice and pay for petrol even when expenses are not reimbursed on time. Anyone who comes into this position from a background in business, and who is used to working with professionalism and integrity, will be driven mildly insane. The job description also needs to state that the job is not, in fact, ‘Manager’, but ‘Personal Assistant’. It is also a full-time position; one is expected to be on call literally 24 hours a day, seven days a week, and to be psychically aware of events about which one has not been told.

I am, in one sense, sad to be leaving; many of the people I have met through the company have been fantastic, inspirational persons to whom I wish the very best of luck for the future. It is a shame to have to leave this network of lovely people due to the actions (and often non-actions) of one person, but at the end of the day I have my sanity and sleep to consider.

So, what about you guys? Any other boss-from-hell experiences out there? I'm sure there are many!

Why I ran screaming from BT into the open arms of Virgin

2009-12-21T09:38:00.000-08:00

A year ago, I moved into a pretty cottage in the grounds of a hotel. It was lovely, if impractical. I called BT a month before moving in and informed them of my new address. They said I had to renew my contract or I'd have to pay a humongous cancellation fee. Despite having had consistently awful service from them since I joined, I had to stay with them as the deposit for the house had bruised my bank balance.

Anyway, they assured me that service would arrive on the day I moved in. This, of course, was not the case. I moved in to the property to find that neither the phone nor the internet was working. I called BT - on a mobile, at an extortionate rate - and told them the line wasn't working. They told me it was, and hung up. Literally hung up on me. This went on for two months: Husband or I would call the so-called 'customer services' department; they would tell us there was nothing wrong with the line and hang up on us. Eventually we managed to get through to a nice man named Gary, who listened to what we had to say and said he would send an engineer. Obviously it was one of those "between 8am and 6pm" things, so Husband took the day off to wait at home.

The engineer didn't arrive. We called BT to ask why. They told us that our line was working, so the engineer had been cancelled. We told them the line wasn't working. They hung up. This went on for another few days, until we got through to someone who listened to us and arranged for another engineer. Husband took another day off. The engineer arrived. He was very nice. Sure enough, there was a fault with the line. He fixed it. Service appeared.

Then we received a bill for the two months during which we had had no service. We called BT. They hung up. We called back. I lost my temper slightly. They told us the line had been working the whole time. We told them it hadn't. Eventually, after a long and complicated process of talking to the engineer and getting him to talk to them, they realised that they were being stupid - yet again - and told us we didn't have to pay for no service. Great.

Then we moved again. We do that a lot, we like to have a change of scenery. I called BT and told them I wanted to change provider. They said I couldn't. I was too tired to argue. They transferred our (still slow, still patchy, still disappearing-internet-every-five-minutes) service over to our new address. Again, it took weeks to arrive, then it was there.

Some time later, I went online to find an 'important notice from BT' coming up instead of my homepage. Husband called them. They said they had cut our service because we hadn't paid the bill. We told them they hadn't sent us a bill. They said they had. We checked the bill online: £7 for calls. Fair enough, we hardly use the phone. £23 for phone and broadband. Fair enough. But the bill came to £183, which obviously is not the sum of 7 and 23. We clicked the 'breakdown' link. It told us the bill was for 'excess broadband usage'. This made very little sense. I work from home online. Husband spends a lot of time online. We therefore have unlimited broadband.

We called BT. They could not seem to understand the concept of 'unlimited'. The first guy hung up. The second guy didn't see what we were saying. Husband, trying very hard not to scream, patiently took him through the steps. "If something is unlimited", he explained, "then there is no limit on it. Therefore you cannot use an 'excess amount' of it. Therefore you cannot bill us for excess usage of our unlimited broadband." The man seemed puzzled. Husband gave up.

A little while later, after a cup of tea and some calm, Husband called back and got a very rude man named Sanjeev, who shouted at him. Husband did not appreciate being shouted at by Sanjeev, particularly considering that we had not shouted, despite the complete lack of cerebral activity among BT employees. Eventually Husband got the message across. Sanjeev informed us that BT had switched us to the basic package. We had not asked for this. Husband told Sanjeev that we had not asked for this. Sanjeev shouted. Husband hung up.

We called back. We tried to reason with two more BT employees, until we both wanted to strangle the phone with its own windy cord. We gave up.

Frustrated and desperate, I called Virgin. I was very surprised that someone picked up after two rings; with BT, we always had to wait at least half an hour. The lady was very nice. I explained that I would like to become a customer. She took me through the options. I told her it was very important to me that we have unlimited broadband. "All our broadband is unlimited", she replied, sounding puzzled that anyone would expect anything inferior. I picked a package I liked. She said my self-installation kit would be with me in 48 hours. I made a cup of tea.

Around 40 hours later, snow fell. Heavily. Trains were cancelled, the city was thrown into a frenzy. I expected delays in delivery. But my trusty Virgin package arrived. I followed the steps and encountered a technical hitch. I called Virgin. A nice lady named Claire answered after three rings. She helped me work out what was happening, then said something was wrong. It took a couple of days, but they worked out what it was, and today they called me to tell me that my service had been activated. I checked. It was working. I spoke to five different employees at Virgin, and all of them answered promptly, listened to what I was saying, responded and acted quickly and effectively. I have lost count of the number of BT employees to whom I have spoken - or attempted to speak - and all except one shouted, were rude, refused to listen to me and then hung up.

Thus I sent BT a letter. I'm leaving them. They are awful. Anyone who's shopping around: don't go to BT, go to Virgin. They're nicer.

And it's not just me. For more BT horror stories, check out the BT Community Forums.

Blog Marketing Fail - How not to email people

2009-12-14T13:51:00.000-08:00

As anyone who has read my profile will know, I work in viral marketing. I am therefore sympathetic to others who do the same. I also started out in online marketing with no previous experience, and am therefore also sympathetic to those who are just finding their feet in the business. But when I receive an email like the one that landed in my inbox today, some of that sympathy dissipates. It went like this:

'Hey Blogger - My name is David

I have been searching the Internet for blogs that match our criteria and I wanted to invite you to become a paid blogger at Blog Distributor. (Please understand that I do not send this invitation to every blogger I come across, nor is this a guaranteed acceptance as we can't do a true review of the blog until it reaches our blog analysts').

...

Our system is set up so that bloggers can make more money with us than with any other blog-for-pay firm. In short, we are the middle man between you and the advertiser. We match the correct blogs with the correct advertisers, who pay us to do so. And then we pay you, the blogger on behalf of the advertiser. You only take the advertisements that you want and are comfortable with. In no way does this alter the owersship of your blog. You simply get paid to write postings on your blog that you choose to write. You do what you want, when you want. You decide what content to accept or decline.

...

I know some people might be worried, getting some random e-mail, so please do write me if you have any questions or concerns. Also do a search for us on Yahoo or Google and look for reviews.'

***

There is so much wrong with this.

Firstly, my name is not 'Blogger'. My name is Scarlett. This is really, really easy to work out by looking at the URL of this blog. If you found me through another one of my blogs, then you must have gone to the 'About Me' section to find my email address, where you will have also found my name. Use it. If for some reason you find using someone's name too difficult, a simple 'Hi' will do.

Secondly, what do you mean by 'searching the Internet for blogs that match our criteria'? What are these mysterious criteria that I have unwittingly fulfilled? Oh! But perhaps I haven't fulfilled them: '(Please understand that I do not send this invitation to every blogger I come across, nor is this a guaranteed acceptance as we can't do a true review of the blog until it reaches our blog analysts')' Why are you contacting me if you don't know whether you want me to use your service? Why should I go to the trouble of clicking through to your website and filling in the tedious form for each of my seventeen blogs at your demand, when you're not even sure if you want me? Contrary to what you may believe, I do have better things to do with my evening - which you would have known if you'd read my 'About Me' page, from which you picked up my email address.

Thirdly, grammar and spelling. They make a difference. "...until it reaches our blog analysts' " ~ your blog analysts' what? Eyes? Ears? Attention? 'In no way does this alter the owersship of your blog.' Ownership. I know it's a big long word, but that's what spellcheck is for. It reflects very badly on a company if you can't spell in your initial email.

Fourthly, empty claims. '...bloggers can make more money with us than with any other blog-for-pay firm.' Based on what statistics, exactly? How do you know how much other companies pay me to blog?

***

Anyway, being a patient person, I decided to sign up and have a look around. I followed the link to the Blog Distributor website, and clicked on the bit that said Blog Distributor's Rules. They all looked pretty straightforward, until I got to point 16:

'We will not accept postings with notes indicating the posting was paid for or is a sponsored posting (or any other language that communicates this point). If a note exists elsewhere on your blog that speaks of paid or sponsored listings, that's ok, it just cannot be on or near the posting done for Blog Distributor, and the postings that you create for Blog Distributor cannot be in a "Paid" section of your blog.'

For me as a blogger, disclosure is very, very important. If I'm being paid for a post, I'll tell you. I might not write it in huge flashing lights at the top of the post, but there will be a 'Sponsored Post' link, or something similar. Why? Because I value my readers, few though they may be.

Also, I'm pretty sure that it is in fact illegal to not disclose that you're being paid for a post. I emailed David to tell him this. To his credit, he responded very quickly. At ten o'clock at night. His reply?

'We don't have any problem with bloggers disclosing that the postings and sponsored or they receive money for them, as long it's not actually WITHIN the blog posting. That's all. Google looks for blogs that disclose they get paid in the actual blog posting and removes their PageRank in a snap of a finger, so, that's why we don't do disclosure in post. Disclosure is more than fine any other place (and as you said, needed).'

Sorry mate. Personally, I think it's pretty misleading to hide my disclosure somewhere else on the site just for the sake of my Google Page Rank. So no, I won't be signing up.

To be fair, it's difficult when you're sending out hundreds of emails to all different people. I know this. I do it frequently. And yes, I always email each one individually, and use their name if I can find it. Am I perfect? No. Have I made mistakes in the past? Yes, of course. And undoubtedly I will do so again. But this isn't just a simple mistake: it's a complete mess that doesn't take into account the blogger's existence, integrity or relationship with their audience.

And just for the record, this post isn't being paid for and in no way necessarily represents the views of the other people who work at any of my companies.

The Open University promotes new courses with Cleopatra: Beauty or Brains?

2009-12-08T15:13:00.001-08:00

OXFAM Virtual Village

2009-11-30T05:26:00.000-08:00

Something to both keep you amused and help you learn about the huge difference OXFAM Unwrapped Christmas gifts can make: both in the virtual world and in real life:

The Story of Coffee

2009-11-30T05:21:00.000-08:00

Anyone who has spent more than five minutes in my company will be very much aware that coffee is a huge part of my life. You can see it just by looking at my recently-generated TweetCloud, in fact; it's up there with words like 'fantastic' and 'book'. Not only does coffee generate much of my output on Twitter, however; it also keeps me going throughout the day.

How much do I know about the story of coffee itself, though? The answer was 'not much', until I watched this new video from Douwe Egberts, which takes us on a caffeine-fuelled journey through the history of the humble bean.

What Did You Want To Be?

2009-11-19T13:38:00.000-08:00

When I was at primary school, we had one of those sitting around in a circle and talking sessions, in which the teacher went around the class and asked each child what they wanted to be. "Vet", said one girl. "Postman", said one boy. "Footballer", said another boy. "And you, Scar", asked the teacher, "what do you want to be?" Already a glutton for punishment, I looked up at her and replied "Psychology researcher". And now I am.

One of the few things in the world that makes me sad, however, is the number of people who forget their childhood dreams entirely; who lose touch with the enchantment, the creativity, the fantastic world view that kids have, and who end up doing something they hate. The Children's Mutual is currently running a campaign to raise awareness of their work in helping parents to facilitate their children in achieving their dreams.

Schumacher & Calabrese - How (not) to mix a cocktail

2009-11-09T04:02:00.000-08:00

Two guys at the top of their games - Michael Schumacher and Salvatore Calabrese - put their professional skills to the test in this new video to promote responsibility while driving. Calabrese, the world's leading mixologist, tries to mix a cocktail while Schumacher floors the accelerator around a track. Hilarious, and a good message:

The Arts Council Site Launch

2009-11-04T08:27:00.000-08:00

The Arts Council have just relaunched their website, and to celebrate this, artists Thomson & Craighead have created a bespoke new digital art commission:

The Importance of Breathing

2009-11-04T07:58:00.001-08:00

A Beautiful Green Racecar

2009-11-01T03:43:00.000-08:00

We've been hearing a lot about 'green' cars lately. "They're useful", people say; "they don't look so different to normal cars. They're good for the environment." All very true, but they're still not Lambos, are they? There is still a distinct market out there who will look at a Honda Civic and start to cry.

This car may change all that. Swiss company Green GT have come up with this beauty:

Whilst you catch your breath, here are some specifications:

It has a fibreglass body, mounted on a carbon-fibre chassis. Light as.
It's electric.
0-60 in... wait for it... under 4 seconds. Which is pretty damn good.
Estimated top speed? 171mph.

I certainly wouldn't feel ashamed to be seen in one. How about you?

Oh, alright. I want another picture too.

Top Nine Strangely Attractive Animated Characters

2009-10-31T09:10:00.000-07:00

To celebrate the release of Tim Burton's new film '9', a number of bloggers, including the guys over at Hecklerspray, are making our own 'Top Nine' lists. Here's a preview of the film:

And here are my top nine strangely attractive animated characters:

1. Foxxy Love - Drawn Together

2. Duchess - The Aristocats

3. Emily the Strange - Emily the Strange

4. Emily - The Corpse Bride

5. Marge Simpson - The Simpsons

6. Nala - The Lion King

7. Pocahontas - Pocahontas

8. Skitty - Pokemon

9. Tinkerbell - Peter Pan

Kushti Atchin Tan - The life of a Romany Gypsy

2009-10-29T07:02:00.000-07:00

Join the Rally for Romany Rights in Basildon

2009-10-24T07:33:00.000-07:00

Ustiben report

UK: THEN THEY CAME FOR THE GYPSIES

By Grattan Puxon

The appearance of neo-facist leader Nick Griffin on a popular BBC panel programme this week has caused outraged protest by those who fear extreme-right wing policies are becoming acceptable in today's would-be police-state Britain.

But if the British National Party with its million votes is moving into the mainstream, its just as frightening that once middle-ground politicians are willing to court favour with the neo-fascists by assuming a brownshirt colouring.

Romanies and Travellers may have been in Britain half a millennium or more, yet are still not accepted by a middle -England majority. Those who continue to follow a nomadic life -style get it in the neck everyday due to institutional racism locked into our bureaucracy and police forces.

We're seeing it happen in Italy and Hungary, now we'll see it happening here. Twenty miles from the Mother of Parliaments, by the lorry-full and Landrover, with bulldozer and crane - stop them if you dare! - they're coming for the Gypsies.

On UN Human Rights Day 10 December, Basildon's Tory chief will formally lead his cabinet in voting to give a two million pound contract to a bunch of hard-hat bullyboys to oust hundreds of Travellers from his district. It will be the ugliest yet act of ethnic-cleansing by a British local authority against an outpost of Europe's nascent Roma nation.

Certainly the 4,000 Basildon voters who backed the British National Party at the last election will be pleased to have what in effect must be an endorsement of their bigoted anti-Gypsy attitudes. Something for the BNP’s two MEPs to boast about it in the European Parliament.

SOCIAL EXCLUSION

A dirty, neo-fascist wave, a tsunami of social exclusion is to break over the peaceful Dale Farm community, smashing up lives and drowning the hopes of another generation of Traveller children, presently attending local schools.

No matter that the impotent UK Children's Commissioner says it shouldn't happen, and boo to the goose that is the Commission for Equality and Human Rights. The CEHR has let itself be used in the charade which Basildon council calls its court-mandated engagement talks with Dale Farm residents.

Sorry, that should read resident; only one attended this week's hole-in-the corner meeting with hard-nosed get 'em shifted project leader Dawn French.

The incessant message of these talks, now labelled pointless by a Gypsy Council representative, is that hundreds of Dale Farm residents must abandon their homes and land and, voluntarily, wander forth along Britain's rage-ridden roads - where you can't even light a fire nowadays without attracting a fine.

Oh, Basildon may have been told by the UK Government to provide alternative land for the Dale Farm community. Obligatory under the Housing Act.

Only Tony Ball interprets that as a mere request and stands sturdily by his eviction policy, believing the brutal back lane happenings will be quickly covered over by next May's expected Tory election landslide.

In bright new British Cameronland it won’t matter what happened to the Gypsies.

However, there is every sign that Dale Farm is fighting back. The rape of human rights is not something mothers here will take lying down. They are organizing a mass rally outside the Basildon Centre for 12 noon on Human Rights Day, an event they intend will be worthy of that universal anniversary.

They are also seeking to address a last appeal to the cabinet meeting at 7.30 pm that evening.

"We hope," says Mary Sheridan, recently back from Germany, from where 14,000 Roma are being forcibly repatriated to Kosovo, "that those upset by the sight of the BNP on television will be moved to join us in trying to stop fascist talk becoming brownshirt action."

Can blatant racism be halted? Basildon is the next battleground. Meanwhile, Dale Farm residents and supporters have received death-threats, several of which have been reported to Essex police, it was revealed at a Human Rights Day planning meeting last evening attended by former Mayor of London aid Atma Singh.

____________ _________ _

JOIN THE HUMAN RIGHTS DAY RALLY !!

12 noon 10 December

St Martin's Square, Basildon

Transport for supporters: contact

dale.farm@btinterne t.com

APPEAL FOR FUNDS

Veerendra Rishi, director of the Indian Institute of Romani Studies, has started an appeal fund for this event with a one hundred pound donation.

Please send what you can by cheque to:

Dale Farm Housing Association

1 John Harper Street

Colchester C01 1RP

Alien Vs. Predator Game

2009-10-21T09:37:00.001-07:00

Exciting stuff:

Naked People on DaveTV

2009-10-13T01:30:00.001-07:00

More fun stuff from Dave TV: this week, Argumental, in which Frankie Boyle and Rufus Hound debate naturism. Here's a taster:

Guy Proposes On Billboard

2009-09-25T09:46:00.000-07:00

All together now: "Awwww"

RIP Mary of PPM

2009-09-18T07:56:00.000-07:00

Legends.

Car Porn: McLaren's Streetcar Named Desire

2009-09-09T04:21:00.000-07:00

Well, almost. McLaren have unveiled their new road car, based on its F1 sister. To say that it looks good would be a horrendous understatement. It's beautiful. As you'd expect from a McLaren, every last bit of it is designed to increase speed; it's probably the most streamlined thing this side of a dolphin. The doors, for example, don't have handles; they open using a touch-sensitive panel. Yes, I can imagine that breaking all the time too, but it's a damn cool concept.

McLaren are aiming to produce 1,000 of the cars each year; and the asking price is £150,000, which might seem steep, but for a supercar, it's pretty good value.

It's International Literacy Day

2009-09-07T22:35:00.000-07:00

It's International Literacy Day; an event set up in 1965 by UNESCO to highlight the number of people around the world who have never learnt to read. The number stands at 774 million adults and 72.1 million children.

What have you read recently?

Slow Dance

2009-09-07T04:41:00.000-07:00

This was sent to me by a friend. I know it's a hoax email, but the poem is beautiful and expresses perfectly the way some people feel when they're diagnosed with a terminal illness.

Have you ever watched kids

On a merry-go-round?

Or listened to the rain

Slapping on the ground?

Ever followed a butterfly's erratic flight?

Or gazed at the sun into the fading night?

You better slow down.

Don't dance so fast.

Time is short.

The music won't last.

Do you run through each day

On the fly?

When you ask, How are you?

Do you hear the reply?

When the day is done

Do you lie in your bed

With the next hundred chores

Running through your head?

You'd better slow down

Don't dance so fast.

Time is short.

The music won't last.

Ever told your child,

We'll do it tomorrow?

And in your haste,

Not seen his sorrow?

Ever lost touch,

Let a good friendship die

Cause you never had time

To call and say, 'Hi'

You'd better slow down.

Don't dance so fast.

Time is short.

The music won't last.

When you run so fast to get somewhere

You miss half the fun of getting there.

When you worry and hurry through your day,

It is like an unopened gift....

Thrown away.

Life is not a race.

Do take it slower

Hear the music before the song is over.

The Dead Animal Game

2009-09-01T05:54:00.000-07:00

Today, I was reading my friend's blog, which always amuses me, when I found something exciting. It's called the Dead Animal Game, and I can't believe I've never played it. Basically, when you go on a car journey, you add up points for who sees the most dead animals, and at the end of it all, the person with the highest death toll has won. Fantastic. Here are the rules:

The Dead Animal Game - point structure.

Birds - 1 pt (this is all birds, I dont care if it's an eagle or a sparrow)

Small wild - 2 pts (rabbits, squizzers, etc)

Reptiles - 3pts (a crocodile is a reptile. Sorry)

Domestic - 5pts (this includes dogs, cats, also farm animals such as cows and horses)

Medium wild - 7 pts (badgers and foxes)

Large wild - 10 pts (this usually only counts for deer, but if you play the game in the New Forest you could claim a horse on a technicality. Also camels, if you play in the desert)

Human - 25 pts (automatic win, but it's up to you if you want to claim them or not)

You can not claim the points if you kill the animal yourself.

And, for more fantastically weird stuff, head over to Carpe Dentum and read all about the exciting life of an aspiring wig-maker.

Hilarious Exam Answers

2009-08-28T08:06:00.001-07:00

Remember your student days? Here are some hilarious answers to exam questions, found on Highena.

Geography

Q: Name the four seasons.
A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.

Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink.
A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutant
like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.

Q: How is dew formed?
A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.

Q: What causes the tides in the oceans?
A: The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All water tends to
flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon, and Nature
abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight.

Sociology

Q: What guarantees may a mortgage company insist on?
A: If you are buying a house, they will insist you are well endowed.

Q: In a democratic society, how important are elections?
A: Very important. Sex can only happen when a male gets an election.

Q: What are steroids?
A: Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs.

Biology

Q: What happens to your body as you age?
A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.

Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?
A: He says goodbye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery.

Q: Name a major disease associated with cigarettes.
A: Premature death.

Q: What is artificial insemination?
A: When the farmer does it to the cow instead of the bull.

Q: How can you delay milk turning sour?
A: Keep it in the cow. [He got an A]

Q: How are the main parts of the body categorised? (e.g.
abdomen)
A: The body is consisted into three parts - the brainium, the borax the
abdominal cavity. The branium contains the brain, the borax contains the
heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels, A, E,I,
O and U.

Q: What is the Fibula?
A: A small lie.

Q: What does ‘varicose’ mean?
A: Nearby.

Q: What is the most common form of birth control?
A: Most people prevent contraception by wearing a condominium.

Q: Give the meaning of the term ‘Caesarean Section.’
A: The caesarean section is a district in Rome .

Q: What is a seizure?
A: A Roman emperor.

Q: Give an example of a fungus. What is a characteristic feature?
A: Mushrooms. They always grow in damp places and they look like umbrellas.

English

Q: Use the word ‘judicious’ in a sentence to show you understand its
meaning.
A: Hands that judicious can be soft as your face.

Q: What does the word ‘benign’ mean?
A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight.

Technology

Q: What is a turbine?
A: Something an Arab or Sheik wears on his head

Bugatti Diva

2009-08-20T08:47:00.001-07:00

No, it's not a car. It's a coffee machine, because the guys at Bugatti evidently rock. Not content with producing the fastest and most fantastic car in the world, they've branched out into the world of caffeination. Which, let's face it, is as beautiful and important as supercars, no?

So here you have it: the Bugatti Diva coffee machine. It'll set you back £475 - but look at the prettiness! And when you order, you'll receive a free bag of coffee beans, two free coffee cups, and a set of after dinner mints.

Put-Pocketing

2009-08-20T07:12:00.001-07:00

'Put-Pocketing' represents a new initiative brought into play by a team of ex-pickpockets who are now not only reformed but unusually generous. They use their old skills to travel around and place money back into the pockets of the public.

People who have been Put-Pocketed will find money - ranging from £5 to £20 - in their pocket or bag, along with a card from TalkTalk, who are sponsoring the scheme. It has been piloted in London since July 1st, and will continue there until the end of August before being rolled out across other UK cities.

And here's how they do it:

Urgent Action Appeal: Dale Farm

2009-08-20T05:39:00.001-07:00

More than 100 families living in chalets, mobile-homes and caravans in the largest Romani and Irish Traveller community in the United Kingdom, at Dale Farm, Crays Hill, and nearby Hovefields, Essex County, are facing imminent forced eviction. Approximately 1,000 people have been residing on the estate for more than seven years, including many children. The community has been resisting forced evictions attempts by Basildon District Council (BDC) since May 2005 when it voted to clear a large part of the settlement. Although residents hold land ownership titles, sections of the site had no planning permission and Basildon Council has subsequently refused all attempts to regularise the situation, preferring the enforcement option.

Enforcement orders have been served by Basildon Council requiring plot owners to remove their homes, although previously much of the site had been lincensed as a scrap-yard. After the BDC voted to take direct action, the residents sought a judicial review and won in the High Court.

However, this judgment was overturned by the Court of Appeal in January 2009 and an appeal to the House of Lords denied.

Despite the fact the UK Government has told Basildon it is required to provide

land for a minimum of 62 additional pitches by 2011, no alternative site have been made available by Basildon District Council to which the residents can lawfully move.

The wishes of the residents are to remain where they are and not to be split up. There is a strong communal ethic, with the elderly being cared for by the younger generation and small children protected. No one, young or old, wants to be accommodated in bricks-and-mortar housing. Romanies and Travellers feel that having lost the possibility to follow the old nomadic life-style, it is essential to the preservation of their culture and ethnicity to keep Dale Farm community intact.

In line with its duties under the Housing Act 1996, it is incumbent on the BDC to consider the claim of the occupants to not be evicted as the families threatened with forced removal have no place to go.

The community is therefore seeking your support to urge the Basildon Council to:

Put on hold the forced eviction of the Dale Farm community and engage in meaningful discussions with the residents and their representatives for the purpose achieving an amicable solution;

Consider both the possibility of a) issuing planning permission to allow their permanent residence on their present properties, or b) utilizing the four million euro set aside for the eviction to provide an alternative area to which the residents can relocate.

Respect and protect the housing, property, and family rights of the Dale Farm community, and in particular the rights of the children.

Please send an appeal letter by e-mail or fax to the addresses listed below requesting the Basildon Council to act on this issue.

Basildon District Council

Mr. Bala Mahendran, Chief Executive

Basildon Centre

St. Martins Sq, Basildon, SS14 1DL, UK

Tel:+44 1268 533333

Commission for Equalities and Human Rights

Mr. Sean Risdale

Policy Advisor,

3 More London, Riverside Tooley Street

London, SE1 2RG

Tel: +44.20 3117 0235

Sean.Risdale@equalityhumanrights.com

Department for Communities and Local Government

Mr Peter Bates

Zone 7/J9

Eland House

Bressenden Place

London SW1E 5DU

Quiet Room

2009-08-19T05:50:00.000-07:00

Quiet Room is a song about schizophrenia - what it's like to live with, and what can be done about it. You can download the song here, buy the book it's based on on Amazon, or visit the BC Schizophrenia Society's website.

Gypsies Face Jail for Staying In Their Home

2009-08-17T03:36:00.000-07:00

The Hughes family live on a site in south Somerset. They own the land and have lived there peacefully for fifteen years. Now, however, the council have told them they must leave the site by August 30th, or be forcibly evicted. On the site are seven adults and nine children, including a 21-year-old disabled man. Luckily, there is a way to help. Head over to PetitionSpot and sign this petition to help them stay on the land they own and live on.

All the family wish for is to continue living on the land they own. Racial discrimination against Roma people seems to be the one widely-accepted form of racism left in this country and across Europe. Help put an end to it by signing this petition to help the Hughes family.

You Are Being Watched

2009-08-14T09:02:00.001-07:00

I wish I knew where this came from, because it's terrifying. I found it at Bitterwallet.They should put these up around London; the statistics on Londoners being caught on CCTV are pretty freaky.

Slightly Creepy

2009-08-14T08:42:00.000-07:00

Just so you never forget your loved ones, Cremation Solutions is now offering a life-sized urn in the shape and semblance of the deceased's head. Personally, I think that's a little creepy; but whatever floats your boat, I guess.

Ten of the most ridiculous things lawyers and witnesses have said in court

2009-08-11T06:17:00.001-07:00

Q: What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke that morning?

A: He said, “Where am I, Cathy?”
Q: And why did that upset you?
A: My name is Susan.

Q: Did you blow your horn or anything?
A: After the accident?
Q: Before the accident.
A: Sure, I played for ten years. I even went to school for it.

Q: Officer, when you stopped the defendant, were your red and blue lights flashing?
A: Yes.
Q: Did the defendant say anything when she got out of her car?
A: Yes, sir.
Q: What did she say?
A: ‘What disco am I at?’

Q: Was it you or your younger brother that was killed in the war?

Q: How far apart were the vehicles at the time of the collision?

Q: You were there until the time you left, is that true?

Q: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
A: Yes
Q: And what were you doing at that time?

Q: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
A: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.

Q: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?
A: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.

Q: All your responses must be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
A: Oral.

Jeremy Clarkson Beatbox

2009-08-11T01:21:00.001-07:00

What would happen if Jezza were an instrument? This, perhaps:

Impressive Paintings by a Six-Year-Old Boy

2009-07-31T08:36:00.000-07:00

Six-year-old Kieron went on holiday to Devon and Cornwall with his family. Not a particularly remarkable story, you may think. But while he was there, he picked up a paintbrush and produced this:

Damn impressive.

Google Analytics - Hours and Hours of Fun

2009-07-27T09:28:00.001-07:00

Well, minutes and minutes. Topping the list of search terms directing people to my blogs recently:

The Daily Blast - 'international cup of tea day', 'cheese grater app', 'golden pencil', 'signing off an email', 'taxi lewis hamilton kovaleinen', 'the real hair boutique'

This one - 'international cup of tea day', 'cars faster than the mclaren f1', 'hurricane tree photo', and my personal favourite: 'what small furry animals live in the woods'

Studdying - 'tattoo fail', unsurprisingly enough

Beyond Human Nature - 'story of man who use spider to make web in tree for daughter's wedding' - very specific!

Ever Wondered How Motorbikes Are Made?

2009-07-27T09:21:00.001-07:00

In response to my earlier post about businessmen pissing, a friend and equal petrolhead posted this video; not that it has much to do with my post, but it was amusing and I thought I'd share it:

In Today's News, Some Businessmen Go To The Toilet

2009-07-27T05:41:00.000-07:00

In one of the strangest advertising campaigns I have ever seen (and that's saying something!), Weebiz.com is promoting the launch of its business networking website by showing us all how not to do it:

Have you seen weirder? Where?

International Cup of Tea Day

2009-07-26T02:05:00.000-07:00

The last Sunday in July is now International Cup of Tea Day. Whilst coffee is of course my beverage of choice, tea comes a close second; nothing quite beats a nice cup of tea and a sit-down. So go on, celebrate the most passive of holidays! And, if you're feeling sociable, let me know how you take yours. I'm a fairly-strong-with-milk-and-sugar person. Et tu?

Barclaycard Launch Extreme Waterslide iPhone Application

2009-07-24T07:30:00.000-07:00

Following the viral success of the now infamous Barclaycard Waterslide ad, which has featured widely on Facebook, Youtube, various blogs and countless other places on the interweb, Barclaycard decided they'd couple it with another hugely popular medium: the iPhone. Now you can have a Barclaycard Waterslide all of your own, and slide all the way home instead of your boring commute (or pretend to, anyway). Just don't blame me if you get strange looks from your fellow commuters.

Various Examples of Marketing Fails

2009-07-24T05:56:00.000-07:00

As a freelance translator, these examples are nightmare-fodder for my brain; but so far I don't think I've made any terrible errors (touch wood). Here are some of the best marketing failures:

In an American campaign for Electrolux, people were surprised to see the slogan: 'Nothing sucks like an Electrolux'.

When Coors' slogan 'turn it loose' was translated into Spanish, it suddenly became 'Suffer from diarrhoea'.

Clairol released the 'Mist Stick' curling iron in Germany, only to discover afterwards that 'Mist' is German slang for manure.

Pepsi's campaign slogan 'Come alive with the Pepsi Generation' ended up as 'Pepsi brings your ancestors back from the grave' in Chinese.

Coca-Cola's name in Chinese was first read as 'Ke-kou-ke-la', meaning one of two things, depending on inflection: either 'Bite the wax tadpole', or 'Female horse stuffed with wax'. Coca-Cola then decided to research more thoroughly; and eventually settled on 'Ko-kou-ko-le', which translates as 'Happiness in the mouth.'

Pen company Parkers advertised a ballpoint pen in Mexico, using a slogan that was supposed to read 'It won't leak in your pocket and embarrass you'. Unfortunately, Parkers believed that the word 'embarazar' means embarrass. It doesn't. It means impregnate. Final slogan? 'It won't leak in your pocket and make you pregnant'.

A slogan for Frank Perdue's chicken - 'It takes a strong man to make a tender chicken' - when translated into Spanish, became 'It takes an aroused man to make a chicken affectionate'.

Cake or Death?

2009-07-22T13:12:00.000-07:00

I have a friend staying with me at the moment, which is fantastic fun, and she has just introduced me to Eddie Izzard's 'Cake or Death?', and various other hilarious things are now popping up on the screen in front of me, courtesy of Friend. It shall be a good evening, I can tell.

Webtel.mobi Competition Winners

2009-07-22T12:02:00.001-07:00

Webtel.mobi has recently run a competition in conjunction with Zooppa, in which people were asked to create a viral video for Webtel. It went pretty well, and here are the winners, some of which are absolutely hilarious. I'll leave it up to you to decide which you prefer

"PC Gone Wrong?"

2009-07-19T00:51:00.000-07:00

The other day, on the train home from work, I found a newspaper with the heading 'Police to get eight extra days off for Witchcraft'. Intrigued, I took a look, and discovered that Pagan police are now allowed eight days off for their major festivals: Yule, Imbolc, Ostara, Beltane, Litha, Lughnasadh, Mabon and Samhain. The tone of the article was, sadly, quite negative. Besides implying that all Pagans are Witches, it implied that Paganism is not a 'real' religion and should not have the same rights as others.

A letter to the paper the following day stated that this is 'PC gone wrong'. Assuming they mean 'political correctness' rather than 'police constable' (though they probably mean both), one has to ask why. Why is it PC gone wrong? Because it's not your religion? You don't want Christmas? I know many Pagans who would be happy to work Christmas Day if they have the 21st off. Surely that's a good thing, even for the small-minded idiots who don't want to allow them their holidays?

Just as there are Pagan Witches, there are many who profess to be Christian Witches. This works because, contrary to unbelievably popular belief, witches do not fly around on broomsticks, turn people into toads and curse people. They live in harmony with nature and are often healers or practitioners of herbcraft. If, however, Muslims had just been allowed to take time of for Eid, or Jews for Hanukah, or any religion other than Paganism for any holiday, the paper's headline would have been villified everywhere as an example of discrimination, as would the tone of the article.

Think before you speak, people: just because you don't happen to believe in something, it doesn't mean others don't.

What's Beyond the Reverie?

2009-04-26T11:22:00.000-07:00

An excellent poem sent to me by a member of the British Roma Yahoo! Group.

Gypsy romantic mystery,

hiding in the night.

melodic haunted melodies,

and magic witches flight.

Spells and potions, gold and wine

Gypsy women dancing and everything so fine.

Day occurs, the dream is over and Rromani appear to you

The "Gypsy" is gone and the fantasy you long has all but disappeared
from view.

This is not what you desire, to see something you do not wish;

for if you would see the injustice of day, the fantasy can not exist.

Oh how tragic and oh how sad to not be willing to see or truly listen

to the wrong and oh so bad

of the countless deaths,screams and suffering from this fantasy so

very long, this fantasy still presently going on,

this fantasy gone mad.

Oh how tragic and oh how sad, only time and history it seems will reveal

of the children's cries and the media's lies,that you still can not

recognise;

what is fantasy and what is real.

These illusions that steal the truth, of a thousand year old race,

that is just as beautiful and equal to all

and deserves an equal place.

These fantasies and deceiving ways that keeps all humanity blind

from seeing what most Rromani people live each day,a thousand years of

attempted genocide.

Why do you hate us so; you do not even know our name?

And now because they have written it Rromani,the Romanians have found

something else to hate and blame.

No matter where we travel, no matter small group or grand, you think

we are some savage pest,

interfering on "your" land. We tell you where our homeland is, we come

to you to work

but what man do you think will hire us, when they are taught to hate

fear and hide and thus

not even recognise our equal human hands?

You send us to these public schools as children with "special needs"

as though our children do not understand have hearts, good minds or

even bleed.

Bottom of the barrel, garbage of the world, nothing to contribute,

every single man, woman, boy and girl.

How would you feel if you were the one, how would you feel and be,

If out of all the races you were chosen to be Rromani?

To be viewed without the world even knowing that we hold our head up

high,that we know we are not the fantasy

but a humble person of love, peace and equal dignity.

For once, will you open up your hearts and minds to see of the real

truth and history of not the Gypsy fantasy but of the true and

indigenous Rromani.

Tamara Demetro

World's Smallest Cat

2009-04-25T10:21:00.000-07:00

I once knew a cat called Gizmo. He was the smallest cat I had ever seen; no bigger than a kitten, though he was quite old when I knew him. He was black, with big green eyes and razor-sharp claws that he seemed to have trouble retracting.

Meet Mr. Peebles, officially the world's smallest cat. I wonder if he is smaller than Gizmo was?

Hurricane Tree

2009-04-25T09:29:00.000-07:00

This happened in 2007, but being behind the times, I've only just found out about it. The picture is pretty, and the story almost makes it prettier. In 2007, hurricane Gudrun hit Europe. Forestry machines were driven to a wood in Sweden to clear some of the damage; they took away the fallen trees and cleared things up a bit. Then Jocke Berglund, a Swedish photographer, flew over the area to look at the destruction, and noticed that the pattern carved out of the forest by the trucks' paths and the removal of the felled trees formed the picture of a large tree. The photo taken by Berglund went on to win the Natural History Museum's 'World In Our Hands' prize.

"It's as if the heavens had sent a message to the forest industry reminding them that, in this area, deciduous trees would have withstood the winds much better than pine", commented Berglund.

Have you seen the Channel Creature?

2009-04-24T06:11:00.000-07:00

It was a normal day for Thierry and Sophie, walking along the harbour in Boulogne. Thierry was filming the boats sailing out to sea, when suddenly he caught sight of a large, strange shape that appeared on the horizon. What was it? He zoomed in and saw a huge, dark, rapidly-moving object, which disappeared within seconds.

Thierry contacted the Association of Maritime Research, a small organisation formed in 1901 to promote awareness of the unusual phenomena that occur in the depths of the oceans and on the sea bed. Their aim is to gather testimonials and question marine scientists in an attempt to scientifically explain the strange goings-on on the sea bed.

The AMR has now collected a number of testimonials from various areas, all talking about the same gigantic, dark, swift-moving object in the sea. Now they are sending out a call to the general public, asking for witnesses to come forward.

We are calling for anyone who has caught sight of such a sea monster to contact the AMR via The Channel Creature's Website.

A reward is being offered for evidence leading directly to proof of this creature's existence.

Banging in the Nails

2009-04-19T07:43:00.000-07:00

While we're on a musical theme, have a look at the Tiger Lillies. They're... odd, to say the least. But I like them.

The Crop Circles Are Talking To Me

2009-04-18T06:26:00.000-07:00

Well, I always have said my taste in music was eclectic. This morning, I received my copy of Perfect World by The Rohan Theatre Band. Absolutely genius. Buy it. Now. And listen to the MySpace.

On a totally different note, I also rather like this (which is nothing like Rohan, for the record):

Mark Thomas wants us all to vote Green

2009-04-17T08:39:00.000-07:00

What do you think about that?

L.O.V.E.

2009-04-16T15:39:00.000-07:00

Because we all need girly music sometimes...

Oasis

2009-04-16T08:22:00.000-07:00

I do love Amanda Palmer.

The BBC loves us!

2009-04-15T04:07:00.000-07:00

Unruly Media's Viral Video Chart got a mention on Webscape's 'Best of the Web' selection. Of course, we knew we were amazing already ;)

Watch the video here.

Currently topping the VVC (and rightly so!):

Wordle

2009-04-10T13:12:00.000-07:00

UFC coming soon!

2009-04-04T12:53:00.000-07:00

With Billy Joe Saunders in the ring, the Gypsy community have much to be proud of in sport recently. Despite his recent suspension, the boy has shown a dedication beyond the norm: as my husband pointed out, "the kid needs to be given at least one fight a month, he's so damn determined." Go Caravan Kid, I'd say.

Ultimate Fighter Championship is coming soon to your screens, via Virgin, whose boss recently lent his support to Brawn's already-successful F1 team. We'll have to wait until tomorrow to see if they can nab four podium finishes within the first two weeks. I wish them well, even if Massa's disappointed face does break my heart every time I look at it.

Anyway, take a gander at a bit of what will be happening on Virgin soon:

Belly-dancing

2009-04-04T12:36:00.000-07:00

I almost wish I'd taken up belly-dancing at some stage. I never quite had the guts, and now I don't have the figure. Perhaps I will again though, if I just cut down on the brie and sausage sandwiches...

A Gypsy's Prayer

2009-03-24T12:50:00.000-07:00

Amaro Dadus
Savo jives drey o tem oprey
Be sherrafo tiro nav
Avel tiro
Be kaired tiro buti
Oprey o poov sar drey o tem oprey
Del mandi to-divvus amaro divvesko
morro
Ta fordel mandi mandi's pizarripens
Sar mandi fordels wafor mushes
lengues pizarripens
Ta ma sik mandi o drom te temtation
But lel mandi abri fon wafodupen
For tiro se o tem
O ruslipen ta o corami
Cana ta ever-komi
So covar ajaw.

Setting an Example

2009-03-20T15:10:00.000-07:00

'The End' by The Doors is playing on Last.fm; I'm not really sure why I mentioned that, it's just a good song, and one I'm not ashamed to be listening to. Which isn't something I could say about the entirety of my musical taste range.

The Obamas are putting a vegetable patch in the garden of the White House, in the hope that it will yield some sort of sustenance later on in the year. For this (and many other things), I applaud them. I had a vegetable garden for years; now, ironically, I don't, despite living in a 450-acre park (it's not mine).

Good luck to 'em, I say.

Not your average ad campaign

2009-03-19T15:58:00.000-07:00

Since Honda's people started jumping out of planes, spelling words and waving hello to their mothers from the sky, all sorts of agencies have been jumping on the bandwagon of originality. Is that really possible? It's hard to say. Being a bookworm, however, and also a sucker for punishment, I'm quite a fan of the idea of a parachutist reading whilst falling, as per the guy in this clip:

Jezza would turn in his grave, if he weren't still alive...

2009-03-15T05:53:00.000-07:00

You may, or may not be aware that the National Speed Limit in the United Kingdom is to be cut to 50mph, down from 60mph on 70% of the UK's A-roads.

So, we'll all drive 10mph slower, and save 250 lives a year (according to the Department for Transport), whilst cutting emissions.

However, research has proven just 5% of road deaths are caused by speed. The greater problem lies with drink drivers, drug drivers, fatigue and more importantly slow drivers!

If you want more information take a look at these:

http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=55590146273&ref=mf

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/driving/article5864847.ece

and then sign this Government petition:
http://petitions.number10.gov.uk/noNSLreduction/

Photo credit: izaeus|argazk on Flickr

All you need is Lynx

2009-03-10T11:21:00.000-07:00

For all your beautiful women needs:

An Analytics Update

2009-03-08T10:49:00.000-07:00

Google Analytics is so much fun. I love seeing the weird things people have typed in to find my blogs. Here are the latest weird chart-toppers:

Bunnycat Suicide: 'asses', 'beautiful women asses'

Paracademia: 'paradox of researching speechless terror', 'classification necrophilia'

This one: 'human released into the wild', 'corvette stingray c7.r rendered', 'somnophilia', 'sweetness at the bottom of the pie'

Studdying: 'my math and science blog'

The Daily Blast: 'and the resident advisor found me', 'boyfriend handcuffed fire alarm'

The Social Media Junkie: 'spongebob nspcc'

Whatif Books: 'sweetness at the bottom of the pie' (again?!), 'broken bulbs', 'deanna reybourn silent on the moor'

One of my Favourite Things in the World

2009-03-08T04:34:00.000-07:00